AMH Test Results & FSH Test

Phew, what a few days it has been. I had a pretty crazy weekend. On Friday, I decided to call up my doctor and just see what my actual AMH number was....  gulp......  During the phone call on Wednesday, she stated that my number was "a little low". So I was asking the question under the assumption that it wouldn't be that bad. Imagine my shock when she said "yeah, it was less than 0.3.... you might be heading into menopause". ha.... say what?!

Okay, okay, I know.... I've done a LOT of research over the weekend and I know that the AMH number is just ONE part of a series of tests to tell you what's really going on. I'm trying not to focus too much on the number and from what I've read, I have age on my side. My first reaction to that news was bad... like, real bad... I went home immediately and sobbed for an hour on my lunch. Then had to pull it together & come back to work... where, once I was here, I cried from 2-4 at my desk. Most of that crying was good crying from the amazing emails I got from my husband. Something really special he said was this.... I want to sort of immortalize this response:

the things people talk about with raising kids are the times they had with them growing up. not the time spent carrying them or the fact that they had them naturally. what matters to me is the end result. whether it has our genes or not is no barrier to loving and raising a child and getting the same experience and enjoyment out of it that everyone else gets.

So true! It took me a good 15 minutes to get thru that tiny paragraph because I would cry at each word. He's amazing, just truly amazing.

Anyway, I was told that I should have my FSH tested on Day 3 of my cycle so they could compare the two numbers and get a better overall idea of what's going on. I have this dreadful feeling that it won't be good. I'm scared.... but it is happening tomorrow and they said they'd get the restults the same day. GULP. Fingers and toes are crossed.

Regardless of the results, I have read AMAZING stories of all kinds of people all around the world who had the same diagnosis and continued to go and have their own child naturally. Supplements seem to help, and some have had success from strong drugs and IUIs. I'm really really hoping we won't have to go the IVF route. I'm still so confused on whether IVF or adoption is the better route. I know it is a personal choice... but ugh.... I'm scared. I keep telling myself NOT to go there until I know I need to. 

If you read this, please keep me in your prayers... it is much appreciated!

I will update tomorrow with the results. I have to be at my appointment at 7:10 in a city that's 25 minutes away. UGH....early!